Play your Position

By: Davida Grant Brown 

 

If your marriage is anything like mine, you and your spouse have divvied the household and parenting responsibilities.  And on most days, this allocation works.  In fact, not only does it work, it keeps your household and marriage on track.  But on those every once in a while days, it doesn’t.  Despite your commitment to your assigned tasks, you don’t feel like doing it or perhaps even worse, you don’t think you should have to. You want your spouse to handle it for once.  FOR ONCE!  Recently, I had one of “those” days.

In our house, I am responsible for meal preparation and cooking, washing dishes, clearing the table, packing leftovers, making/packing the kids’ lunch, washing/folding the kids’ clothes, bathing the kids, reviewing homework for accuracy and completion, and reading bedtime stories.  On top of that, as a wife, I tend to my husband’s emotional and physical needs. And on top of that, I have coaching sessions in the evening, and/or have to finish up business-related commitments before I call it a night. Now, I don’t expect a lick of sympathy.  I enjoy being busy and willingly took on these responsibilities.  Admittedly, I often pat myself on the back, because I can generally handle these responsibilities with relative ease, except when I can’t. 

A few weeks ago, I nearly “lost” it.  I’d had an extremely difficult, labor-intensive day at the office.  I was running late to what I’ve affectionately dubbed “my second job”, so I was feeling a bit anxious.  When I walked in the house, I knew I only had about 90 minutes to get dinner ready, review homework, read to the kids and get them ready for bed.  There was no time to spare.  Then I saw it.  Dishes everywhere.  On the stove, the counter and the sink.  I hate, Hate, HATE dirty dishes and seeing them sent me over the edge.  The kids were immediately at my feet asking every question under the sun.  “What’s for dinner?” “Did you miss me today, mommy?” “Mommy, can we play together?” “Guess what the teacher said today?”  I tried to muster a smile.  Didn’t happen.  Dishes Were Everywhere.

I walked into the living room and who did I see sitting on the couch in his pajamas watching television with a bowl of nearly depleted ice cream (yes, another DISH) in his lap.  My wonderful husband. His first words were, “What’s for dinner, babe?”

I literally thought I was going to explode.  I didn’t say a word and went up the stairs to my room.  I locked the door, because I knew my little ducklings would be right behind me. Sure enough, 30-seconds later they were at my bedroom door banging away.  “Give me 5 minutes,” I finally uttered, knowing I needed at least 15, but 5 would have to do. I buried my head in my pillow and literally kicked and screamed for a minute.  A million thoughts about my husband and situation ran through my head. How dare he ask me for dinner. How long had he been sitting in front of that television?  Had he given any thought to what he could do to help me?  He needs to shoulder some of my responsibilities.  How could he leave all those dishes in the sink, knowing I’d have to wash them before dinner?  Why didn’t he warm up leftovers, since he knew I was running late?  How could he even utter, “What’s for dinner?”

I took several deep breaths to calm myself and then did an assessment of the situation.  I noted my feelings and took a minute to figure out why I was feeling so frustrated.  Today was just one of those days, but it was my “hectic” day, not his.  I looked at things from his perspective.  He too worked a full day.  He too had household responsibilities to care for, like sweeping/vacuuming the floor, feeding and walking the dog, and picking up the kids from school.  Did he do those things today?  He had.  Do I shoulder more of the household and parenting tasks?  I do, but that’s what I agreed to because of my skill set.  So, was it right for me to be upset with him because I’d had a rough day and didn’t feeeeeeeeel like doing my allocated responsibilities?

I put my pajamas on, gave myself a big hug, unlocked the door and got to work.  It was time to play my position in this marriage and family, because that’s what I agreed to do. And that’s what I did.

60 comments

  • Gina Kelvin Comment Link
    Gina Kelvin
    Wednesday, 29 September 2021
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  • Gina Kelvin Comment Link
    Gina Kelvin
    Wednesday, 29 September 2021
    My husband packed out of the house to live with another woman who he met at work and he sent me divorce papers. I did not want divorce because I love my husband very much and I don't want my family to break apart. I suspected the woman used a spell to tie my husband so he cannot return to his family. I was searching for tips on how to win my husband back and i come across a comment which says Dr Jumba helped her to recover her husband back after several months of breakup and i took the email of Dr Jumba that was present on the comment and emailed him about my problem and he replied back to me and help me to recover my husband back within two days and right now my husband is back with me and he is even more loving than before. You can also contact Dr Jumba for help on his email: wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com or you can call and whatsapp him on +19085174108. Dr Jumba is the best spell caster and I am very happy to testify of his good work. website : https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com
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    Susan Hedstrom
    Friday, 24 September 2021
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    maryjane clement
    Thursday, 23 September 2021
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  • maryjane clement Comment Link
    maryjane clement
    Thursday, 23 September 2021
    Hello everyone i want to testify of the great and powerful spell caster named Priest Jumba who brought back my ex who left me and got engaged to another girl,We where happy together when all of a sudden he just change he used to call me every morning and and night before going to bed but all that stopped when i call him he yell at me and told me he didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore i was so sad and confused i didn't know what to do then i went online to search on how to get back my ex then i found an article where someone was talking about how the great and powerful Priest Jumba helped her and she left his email address i took it and contacted him i told him my problem he only smiled and told me to relax everything will be OK i did everything he asked me to do and he assured me that after 24hrs he will be back,To my greatest surprise the next morning it was my boyfriend he came back knelling and begging for me to accept him back now we are so happy together he can also help you contact him on Email : wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com ,phone number : +19085174108 you can also text him on WhatsApp . website : https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com
  • maryjane clement Comment Link
    maryjane clement
    Thursday, 23 September 2021
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    Sunday, 19 September 2021
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